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Stuart Schrader of SHIT-FI.COM returns today to give you a lesson on AK-47’s “The Badge Means You Suck” single. This is a tier one material for the KBD game, and though it may not be the most strictly hardcore release, it more than has a place here. Without further adieu:

I once made the pronouncement, as I have been wont to do, that the single best anti-cop punk song is “The Badge Means You Suck” by Mikhailt Kalashnikov’s AK-47, released in 1980. To the question, “What about Black Flag’s ‘Police Story’?” my response was simple: “AK-47=smart. Black Flag = dumb.” (The equation may have been more complicated if the response had been “What about The Dicks’ ‘Hate the Police’?”) “Police Story”—with Dez singing, natch—does conjure up memories of getting nailed in the head by a police truncheon outside the Starwood, mostly among those who hadn’t been born yet. What’s more, name me one city that is not run by pigs. But AK-47’s power was in its refusal to attempt to beat the cops at their own game. They wouldn’t fight the cops in the streets. They would brilliantly channel their rage into a 4-minute tirade and match their rage with intellectual acumen by writing caustic lyrics and a chorus that diverted a Houston Police Department slogan. No, the badge doesn’t mean you care. The badge means you suck.

What may be a bit embarrassing to the LBS&A crowd is that the best anti-cop punk song was penned by hippies. Check out the background on the front cover. Then check out the photo of the guitarist printed on the insert of the estimable compilation “Deep in the Throat of Texas.” Then listen to that guitar solo—almost a minute of wild guitar licks played with aggressive reckless abandon. By a hippie. So the best anti-cop song and the best punk guitar solo this side of “Death, Agonies, and Screams,” or perhaps “Warsystem.” It’s starting to sound like I think this record is essential.

So what is it about this song? Well, the bile, the seething hatred of cops, is off the charts. The riff and the hooks are beyond the pale. Great use of phaser too. Actually, the intensity of the song makes me want to call it proto-hardcore, but it’s also punk and hard rock at the same time. And the lyrics. Oh lawd, the lyrics. AK-47 named names—not of cops but of their victims. The front cover of the record lists nine people murdered by the Houston Police Department, a notoriously racist and trigger-happy institution in the 1970s. The song itself details the murder of Milton Glover, a Vietnam vet shot eight times. A bullet, the listener is reminded, pierced the Bible he constantly carried with him. It also mentions Carl Hampton, perhaps the most famous victim of the Houston PD in the 1970s, a black radical who was assassinated after a long stand-off. AK-47 sing, “The man who killed Joe Torres / Never went to jail / The sniper who picked off Carl Hampton / Never paid any bail / The killers of Milton Glover / They might be pulling you over tonight / And if you happen to get shot / Well I guess you started the fight.” Impunity is the essence of state power, and cops are its chief beneficiaries. Perhaps the best defense we (meaning the entire public) have against police excesses is memory. That’s why naming names matters.

Punk songs by definition should not take into account posterity, and AK-47 were clearly engaged in agit-prop for the immediate present, when the Houston PD’s slogan was fresh in the minds of the citizenry. That the band managed to create a historical artifact of unmatched power was actually incidental. Aiming to do so would obviously have resulted in abject failure. But the band did get the attention of the Houston Police Officers’ Association, who sued, to the tune of a million bucks. Problem was, John Law couldn’t figure out the identities of the band members, who used pseudonyms on the record’s insert. So the lawsuit was eventually dropped. The suit, however, did help give the record legendary status—probably not what the boys in blue had intended.

As Texas punk records go, this one is in the mid to low range of rarity and price. It’s no Vomit Pigs. But, yes, in my opinion, it is essential. No serious punk collection is complete without it. This record exemplifies original vinyl’s superiority to latter-day reissues, with its crystal-clear and loud mastering. There were apparently two pressings, but no one seems to know how to differentiate between them. Copies of the sleeve without the back side printed (ie, blank on one side) circulate. A second insert has been spotted in some copies; it must be posthumous because it includes some info about the lawsuit. I’ve seen inserts printed on a variety of paper colors, too. The copy for sale here includes the insert on yellow paper; like most copies I’ve seen, the fragile sleeve appears to be slightly rumpled. I should mention that this record’s sleeve, besides being a brilliant and somewhat bizarre piece of political art, leaves the band name off the front, which is something I love. In this case, the band was subordinating itself to the message, it wasn’t just because they huffed too much glue or something, like Chemotherapy.

I’ll leave you with a quote on the contradictory nature of police under capitalism from The Iron Fist and the Velvet Glove: An Analysis of the U.S. Police, published in 1975: “Although the police are . . . a repressive institution that operates to contain the poor and powerless, they are themselves exploited, not only by miserable working conditions and social isolation but also as instruments of laws and policies which they neither control nor benefit from. The police protect private property but do not own it; as guardians of the peace, they defend government policies of imperialism and racism but do not derive any significant benefit from them; and in their repression of popular movements, the police legitimize a political order which they did not create.”

Oh yeah, the record has a flipside too.

Thanks to Ryan Richardson for spiritual guidance.

Class is in session! Below, Cooch breaks down the details that stand out about bootleg copies of United Blood. Don’t be swindled!

DUBIOUS EBAY AUCTIONS - BUYER BEWARE!

For some unknown (and embarrassing, at least to myself) reason I have never owned an original copy of Agnostic Front’s “United Blood” ep. I don’t know why this is, since I’ve had my hands on a good number of copies over the years and I own just about every other early NYHC record. So I decided this year I’m just going to plunk down the cash and buy one regardless of price (within reason). After getting beat on ebay for two bona-fide original copies around $300 within the last couple of months, I noticed a smattering of bootlegs for sale as originals.

I emailed the seller of the first copy, and he insisted it was real even though the cover has two telltale marks of the American made bootleg - the cover is a poor quality repro and the copyright information from the bottom of the back cover has made its way to the bottom of the front cover due to a poor print job (and as a result the repro is missing a bit of empty space over the AF banner that is present on the orig), and from the 2nd picture, the pressing marks do not match the original[1] (the boot has a wider diameter, shallower pressing stamper mark around the center hole, original is smaller and deeper). Anyways this unscrupulous seller (also selling many white power records, go figure) got $282 for this copy, I hope the buyer realized it was a boot upon receiving it and was able to get a refund (probably not).

Boot copy number two came up about a week later (sorry no link, same version as above) and I again emailed the seller to see what he thought, and the guy quickly realized it was a boot and canceled the listing. At least there are some honest people out there.

Currently listed copy #3 - Again this one looked like the shoddy cover bootleg so I emailed the seller. Here’s the back and forth -

Me: can you give me matrix information?
Seller: The matrix reads ; AF-001-A and BIOBH on the printed label side and the other label is black.
Me: Oh, that is a bootleg then, that “BIOBH” is actually the number 31634 and the B label should be white.
Seller: I dunno, the matrix #’s check out. If it is a boot, Its an older one, as these records were all purchased in the early 80’s.

At this point, the seller basically refused to acknowledge that he is selling a bootleg, or at least that he is misleading bidders who might believe it’s original, and thus is going to hose the high bidder for $160+ when the auction ends. Greedy/unscrupulous sellers like this are really what makes ebay a crapshoot to the entry level buyer, unfortunately. This seller also has up a lot of nice early 80’s USHC stuff, but obviously does not know much about the records themselves (many are incorrectly listed in regards to their respective pressings, see Minor Threat and Negative Approach 7″s), so, all I can say is… buyer beware!

Footnotes:

[1]Chalk it up to completely useless nerdery (but moreso being involved in releasing a good amount of records over the past 8-9 years), but you can differentiate pressings of certain records by the impression the pressing machine leaves around the center hole. On the original United Blood, the pressing mark is a small, deep circle about 1″ in diameter, and most other early 80’s NYHC singles have the same marks. I believe they were pressed by a plant called Variety that was located somewhere in the NYC area. Check your Mob 2nd 7″ for reference.

Hey everyone, it’s time for another guest posting, this time by Tony Rettman who you might know from WFMU radio, http://200lbu.blogspot.com/, or hanging around New Jersey record stores for the last 20 years (I’m guessing). Check out the radio show, lame bands like Mind Eraser get to play on it sometimes.

TR:

I’ve vented my spleen more than a few times over the revisionist ways of youngsters regarding the infamous Mutha label. How and why and where this label got the reputation it now has I cannot pinpoint. What I do know is most of their releases were laughed at, spat on and most possibly shat on when they were originally released in the eighties. There’s no denying the label is an intriguing chunk of underground history, but the amount of actual worthwhile material released on the imprint is miniscule at best. One slab they released that I will throw my weight behind is this Cyanamid seven inch from 1984. Cyanamid is one of those rare bands that just seem to sound stranger as time goes on. When I was a wee nip, their live sets were nothing more than a confusing mess. On record, they could sound like anything from Flipper on 16 rpm’s to abuncha wind up monkeys on outdated cough syrup. At the time of this six song seven inches’ release, I chalked it up as a novelty and that was that.
 
Upon further listening in the past few years, Cyanamid’s frenzied sound has reminded me alot of the slash-and-burn improvisational style of stuff like Rudolph Grey’s Blue Humans or late eighties Lower East Side noiseniks Demo-Moe. It is at this time I will stop typing and imagine the entire bid hardcore audience staring at their computer screens in utter confusion at those band names while the sound of crickets can be heard from outside their window. Hey…what can I say? I’m just trying to broaden some horizons…to turn some people onto some outlandish sounds…I’m also trying to get rid of some extra Blue Humans records I got laying around this place. Hi-Ya! Napalm Death send props out to Cyanamid on the inner sleeve on ‘Scum’* but I’ve always thought of Cyanamid as way more gnarled and loose than Harris and company. Nonetheless, you probably should get this to complete your Mutha collection and further your standings as a Hardcore nerdboy. I mean…even if you don’t dig it, at least you’ll have something to talk about with your pals at the next Punk Rock show before you go home to spend another wonderful night cold and alone with your records.

*note from cc: I was advised to fact check that they do indeed get a shoot out in Scum, however I was not able to because I originally owned it on tape (thankyou list was removed from the layout), the booklet to my CD appears to be missing, and the only vinyl I own is a test pressing (ahem, dated june ‘87). So while I’m not able to actually look this up, I can own up to having Scum on 3 formats, and of course that little ol’ test press.

Today’s guest blogger is Jon Westbrook from sunny (Southern) California. You may remember him from Knife Fight, or some bands he doesn’t want you to interview him about. In his words, “I don’t speak Spanish, so I don’t have anything interesting to tell you”. He’s also a purveyor of very fine vinyl platters.

I’m sure a lot of you saw this posted over at the livewire records message board, but cc’s on vacation this week and I’m working crazy hours these days (tax season….ok, I’m too lazy to scour ebay every hour in the hopes that some badass platters turn up, but honestly…tax season). Looks like we have the start of a whole collection being sold right now. Hopefully the seller didn’t blow his ebay load on this first batch though, because there’s some pretty good ones up there. Always better to build the hype if you want serious money for your goods. The most likely winner of the bunch will be the Antidote “Thou Shalt Not Kill” EP. I can’t imagine anyone not knowing this EP by now, but in case you’re a n00b, it’s a definite top 5 USHC ep, and in most cases top 2 (Negative Approach is better). Only 500 made, backups by JJ, feat members of M.O.I., yadda yadda yadda. Other gems include an original SSDecontrol “The Kids Will Have Their Say,” FU’s “Kill For Christ,” Rest In Pieces “My Rage,” and the ever popular XChorusX LP. The majority of this collection is in the straight edge vein (80’s and 90’s). And seeing that the seller is from Italy, maybe we’ll get lucky and get some Wretched, Underage, and Bloody Riot records next go around (here’s to hoping). But if there’s one thing to learn when it comes to record collecting for the person who’s serious about owning the best of the best, consider this anecdote: For many of my teenage years and into the early 20’s, I used to curse my parent’s names for waiting 8 years to have children. I thought paying $50 for a record was absurd, and thought “if only I was 5 years older, I could have paid “absurd” prices by 1989’s standards.” But a wise man once told me “if you have the money, just buy it because it’ll be worth more than that in a few years.” Just think about how dumb I’d feel now if I had passed on paying $75 for that Antidote EP in ‘97…